Morgalla the film? Someone tell Hollywood they've gone too far

Recently, Jon made a post suggesting that Morgalla should be given a film because she 'isn't following in anyone else's footsteps'. Jon believes that because many super-heroines have their names or origins based on men (for example, batwoman came about from batman) suddenly these women are un-interesting or less worthy of a film than Morgalla. What Jon fails to realise is that most of these have yet to be given their own film yet, meaning Jon thinks that even though some of the leading ladies aren't being considered for the big screen suddenly the answer is to put a poorly-conceived, anti-feminist character in the spot light.

Here's why Jon is wrong on so many levels. There are plenty of super-heroines not completely based off of male counterparts. Some being Huntress, Black Canary, Bumble Bee, Zatanna, Starfire, Raven, Wonder Woman, Mrs Marvel, any female mutant from the X-men series and Spoiler to name a few. So no Jon, not 'most female superheroes are based off of a male counterpart'. Once again underlining Jon's complete and utter lack of knowledge of the comic industry and why he should stop trying to beg his way in when he knows jack shit.

The most hilarious thing about this recent post is how he things Morgalla is a prime example of what female characters should be like and how she's such a 'step up' for women. She's not, she's a step all the way fucking down. A female character that is really just a puppet for a man's voice, completely receptive and accepting of emotional abuse from her so called boyfriend, warped republican political ideas that are harmful to women and genuinely a testament to how a male author shouldn't write a female character.

I'd rather watch a thousand movies about the different Batwomen; Barbara Gordon, Stephanie Brown, Cassandra Cain, Kate Kane and all their fantastic growth than one terrible movie about Morgalla. Jon undermines some of the greatest women in comics just because they started out linked to a man. Newsflash Jon, with Batman INC up and running there are going to be lots of people taking the Batman name. However, I bet Jon would never complain about a Batman of the future movie, or a Nightwing movie just because these heroes have a link to another man.

In short, when Jon talks about Morgalla being a great role model or a breath of fresh air for women... laugh at him. Laugh at him in the face.

Too buff for the critics? Or just a little typical?

Like every great author Jon thinks that he's being held down by the man. However, Jon goes a little bit beyond that. For a man who really hates feminists and women in general, he's absolutely dead set on the idea that the reason he can't get published is because his female lead isn't 'conventionally' attractive.

Really Jon? You don't think it could possibly be your terrible writing style, your incapability to spell properly or use correct grammar, complete lack of characterisation, lack of a diverse cast, insufferable political soapbox or your inability to describe anything important in any kind of detail?

No? You still think it's that the male dominated industry just don't like the muscle-building type?

I'll give Jon one thing, he's right in saying that the industry (or industries counting comics) do only want one kind of woman, but I highly doubt that this is the real problem Jon is actually facing. Maybe he'd have more fans if Morgalla was 'conventionally' pretty, but we all know the story and writing would still suck so bad that it would never in a million years get published. So this isn't a primary problem for Jon but I think he likes to mention it so much because he thinks it gives him 'feminist points'.

Every time he points out that Morgalla isn't a 'typical, blonde, big-chested' woman, it feels like he thinks he deserves a cookie or something.

Not to mention he has something odd against Barbie. Then again that's probably because she's the so called 'epitome' of white femininity and she probably reminds him of all the really good looking girls in his life who turned him down.

Don't mess with Barbie; she'll cut you bitch.

He even tries to break down Morgalla's figure but effectively fails. He mentions imagining her to have a gymnasts figure yet draws her with the figure of a body-builder  So which is it Jon? Is she a body-builder or a gymnast, those are two pretty distinct fucking figures that don't really coincide. Not to mention just fighting on a daily basis doesn't make you a body builder. I did karate for five years and my sensei had done it for thirty; he didn't look like Jasper's Hellaids mutation after all those years. To be a body builder you have to weight lift and train, yet Jon makes no specific notes in the book as to either Morgalla's or Jasper's training routine. Jon's contradicted himself; he says Morgalla's figure comes from fighting but you don't get a body-builder figure from fighting- and I know he's going for body-builder because he talks about it so often. So, we have a figure that's inconsistent with her work out routine, but maybe it's in the demons genetics to be that big! Too bad Jon doesn't fucking explain anything.

Jon, you're not doing this because you're liberal or body image positive for women. You're doing this because it's your fetish and you fetishise women. 

P.S. This is a female body-builders figure. 

This is a female gymnasts figure. 

PRETTY BIG FUCKING DIFFERENCE JON

4 Billion Dollars? Imagine all the pussy Jon could buy

The crude title is because it's Halloween and I'm a cranky witch living in accommodation where I can't light candles. So Jon, feel my wrath.

Jon's going on about Lucas selling out to Disney after having an early career where he started out hating people with 'more business and no art'.

Let's get this straight, in certain terms it's completely correct to say that Disney is literally the devil itself when it comes to being a gigantic corporation that controls most of the media and enjoys that sweet, sweet sin of soulless greed. However, Disney has pumped out a lot of art in the last few decades. Maybe Jon just didn't notice because he's too busy resenting anything remotely feminine and aimed at girls. Then again, maybe I'm wrong, maybe Disney has never produced anything of artistic merit.

It's not like Disney ever created something with an epic soundtrack as well as stunning visual effects.

Disney is just so heartless and I can't think of even a single thing that bloody company did that was ever artistic or conveyed emotion in a realistic and moving manor.

Not to mention, I don't remember being taught anything from their movies. They're all so bland and obviously void of any kind of meaning.

You get my point. Though Star Wars is a far cry from some of these animated movies and Disney as a company isn't the perfect or most reputable name to sell your soul to, let's look at some of the facts. At least Jon got it right in saying that Lucas has the right to sell to the mouse. Lucas is getting on in years and he wanted to milk the last of his cash cow. Even though Jon doesn't go mad about Lucas selling out, I can see a little bit of nerd hatred going on and I can certainly see some stabbing comments in the process.

The problem being the fact that Jon would be exactly like this if his story idea was worth jack-shit. In fact, Jon sounds just like Lucas; not wanting to let 'Hollywood types' take control of his film because everything needs to be perfect, but eventually becoming more of a jack off than he is now because of all the power and control going to his head. The only thing is that Morgalla isn't and never will be as popular as Star Wars or Harry Potter or The Lord of the Rings. Why? Well you should know by now.

However, the example stands that Jon would go on a tirade if allowed to make a shitty film version of his book. He'd complain and complain, milk it for all it was worth whilst still being ignorant enough not to acknowledge what a tool he was being. Jon isn't an author or even a writer, mainly because writers tend to care a lot about the material they put out there and are constantly writing to review and improve. Jon is writing because he wants to be famous, he wants recognition and money. Granted, all writers want that but they usually have a point behind the things they're trying to write. They want their story to be different, to mean something and teach the reader a lesson.

Jon's book is his own wet fantasy come to life with no morals, lessons or even plot really standing behind it. The novel meanders around it's own point, gets confused as to what it wants to tell you and then just kind of shrugs it's shoulders and drops you off at the end. Thoroughly leaving you confused as to whether you started drinking at some point through the book, since that's usually the only way you end up that lost about what you're reading.

That kind of writer, or dabbler, just wants the money. I can probably tell you what Jon would spend his on. He'd donate a good deal to Mittens, like the good Republican ass wipe he is and then spend the rest of it trying to get laid. No really, I'd like to see him deny it. I'd be surprised if he hadn't already tried. This is Jon's future if he were to ever hit it big.

Happily marrying the supposed 'whores' and 'trailer trash' he so lovingly dubbed in his book. Why? Because Jon's morals aren't really there. They're nothing but hot air he likes to pretend he cares about but if he ever got the chance to throw them off he would.

Either that, or he'd go on one of those pathetic marriage strikes those MRA's like to do, as if it's an actual loss for women not to be able to marry them.

Jon can marry Morgalla, I mean, he's half way there with Jasper.

Or he can marry himself - either way, we women will survive.

Morgalla in pink? There's a first time for everything

I've said it once, I'll say it twice. Morgalla needs to get a wardrobe. The kind of wardrobe that doesn't consist of random Republican slogans and the odd attempt at looking like Jon actually cares about shit.

Now, usually you'd applaud an author for taking active interest in a charity, especially one as big as 'Breast Cancer Research' but the reason I'm not giving Jon his props is because it feels so forced. Jon chose the most typically female charity he could - one with a pink symbol and everything - to try and show his support for women. Note how this is about as feminine as Jon will ever allow Morgalla to look and how the slogan he's chosen is still pretty typical of his muscle bound fantasy women.

Not to mention many feminist groups have issues with the campaign. The symbol was stolen and changed colour when the women who first used it refused to have her symbol used by the charity. The campaign then went and sexualised the disease by making it based around 'save the boobies' and 'save second base' rather than 'save the women attached to the boobs because for fuck sake they're actually the important thing here'.

So Jon, you still haven't won over the feminists yet.

I don't really know why Jon has chosen to support this charity/campaign but he seems to do work for it pretty regularly.

Here's another chance for you to ask me 'But Toxic, surely this time you're just gripping about a man with good-intentions? It's a charity for Christ sake.' I hear you friends, I hear you.

But it's all just too typical. Supporting the biggest female-orientated charity known to the western world, which even has a conveniently  feminine public image. It's too obvious that Jon ran for the first charity that benefited women that he saw, just to say he cared. How much money do you think he actually donates to them? He's never mentioned. He only ever draws.

What's even better about these pictures is that on DA they have links that go to Jon's Amazon and Create space.  Yeah, because it's not like actually fucking linking to the charity or mentioning why you support the charity would make more sense in place of advertising yourself.

PRIORITIES JON, PRIORITIES!

Masters of the Universe; too violent for the man who laughs at Hippy headshots?

Remember these guys?

Hippies

Yeah, they were white people appropriating just about every culture they could get their hands on - and yeah, they were annoyingly doped up and stupidly optimistic about 'peace man', but it would take a really soulless bastard to laugh at a group of them dying.

Cue Jon.

Hippies weren't the most politically correct group in the world, neither were they always the most helpful. Though I suppose at it's core we can hold onto the fact that humanity saw an era of people that just didn't care about the government or the rules - even if it was just a fad.

Jon is a man who admits to laughing at the scene in Watchmen when a group of hippies are shot literally point blanc. Especially a young girl who doesn't look more than 16 years of age.

So Jon can handle and even laugh at the horrific violence against a sub-culture his ridiculously right tendencies caused him to hate, but a decapitated demon head is a step too far?

To use a phrase coined by my friend Ali over the years... PRIORITIES JON, GET SOME!

For Jon to babble on about how he enjoyed Mortal Kombat and drew inspiration from it, only to then counteract with how he cut the violence from his own work is a slight misinterpretation of facts. Jon didn't cut the gore from his book altogether; his writing skills are just that horrible that the gore and violence becomes as bland as everything else.

Jon's fight scenes are a mess of switching viewpoints and sub-par descriptions that leave the reader wondering whether anything interesting is actually going on.

Let's just say he's no J.R.R Tolkien when it comes to battle scenes.

The idea that Jon would purposefully cut any violence or gore from his book is literally an insult to his own genre. Harry Potter was for kids and though it wasn't gory, it took death seriously and it took the kids reading it seriously. Lord of the Rings was plenty violent and just about any popular young adult book will handle violence at some stage. Why? Because violence and conflict is a natural stage in the progression of plot and depth. We see characters grow in battle; their personalities and morals are tested in the most extreme situations.

Jon's characters simply seem to fall flat; revealing either horrendous character faults, like Jasper's ever prominent list of priorities (THA BULLIES GUYZ, I'M SO ANGRY) or Morgalla's complete and utter lack of a relationship with her so called mentor. Not only this, but Jon's chosen creatures are naturally violent and gory. Jon's story would benefit from being more gory because it would stay true to legend. We have this un-realistic bad guy that just does nothing the whole way through. We're told he's a really bad guy but never see anything that makes him stand apart from anyone else. If he say, killed an army of humans mercilessly and had there corpses prepared in a mighty demon feast, maybe then I'd believe he was half as bas ass as Jon made him out to be.

Jon is a kid who has watched one too many simplistic cartoons about good vs evil. I love the emphasis Jon always puts on having a simplistic plot without ever realising that even simplistic plots will have complicated characters and events to make them interesting. The Lord of the Rings was essentially good vs evil, but we at least saw the different alliances, had more than one epic battle and got a story that despite having a plot that could be boiled down to the age old tradition of good guys fighting bad guys, actually kept our attention.

Jon's drive for simplicity is his un-doing. We see one epic battle that isn't even that epic. The characters are dull and un-involved to the point where I don't care if they live or die. The ending is a let down with a villain that doesn't even appear. Okay, Sauron doesn't make a massive appearance in The Lord of the Rings either, but at least the people fighting in those books knew what they were fighting against and the severity of the situation. Jon just has random, not-very-strong creatures come piling out of the ground and then suddenly the towns peoples get all patriotic. It's like stars and stripes should be playing in the background. Too bad Jon can't write motivational speeches either. I think if someone tried to rally me at a battle with one of Jon's speeches, I'd be skipping off to safety in seconds.

Jon tried to do a Morpheus and failed.

A place more like Mordor... lazy writing goes from bad to worse

Jon, what can we say about your work?

It's misogynistic. That's true.

It's bland. Check.

It's lazy? Oh, definitely.

One of the original lines from Jon's un-revised work was 'the stuff of nightmares; it looked exactly the way you'd imagine it to be.'

How lazy is that? He's describing his version of hell and we just get told 'well basically whatever you want it to be really.' That's so boring and un-imaginative.

So now he's just trying to rip off Mordor.

Oh yeah, that's a real writer right there. Blatantly stealing ideas because he has no imagination of his own. Even if his idea was similar he could of explained his version of hell a lot better than he did. Only now do we discover that demons get more powerful with age. Before hand we didn't even know if there was a ranking system, even though some demons were killed by bullets whilst others brushed them off.

Then there's some strange sort of portal system in Jon's hell that's never really explained.

Somewhere between the poorly described version of Hell and the 'wolf-like' demons, my soul gave out and I was left a husk of my former self.

Lazy writing; Jon's goes from bad to worse.

Harley Quinn, too cute for ya puddin'?

Harley. My baby. My sweet little girl that I will defend to my last breath.

I'm a Batman fan-girl and there's not much you can get past me on a good day.

Harleen Quinzel is often seen as nothing more than a dopey blonde airhead who should probably be dead by now - but she's much more than that. Harley Quinn bought humanity to someone where it was a struggle for even the Batman to find good. Essentially, Harley was that reminder that every now and then even the most sane, intelligent person wants to be outrageous.

The reason I have respect for this character is because she's more than what she seems. It's true, at her base Harley could be seen as a fallen woman who is the ultimate annoying fan-girl that gave everything for love. Something that is really looked down on in modern society. However, there's another side to Harley. The tragic story of how an intelligent woman was charmed into an abusive relationship that she can't leave. Harlene was a respected psychologist who was good enough to be accepted into Arkham with some of the most violent criminals in the world. What happened? She fell for the Joker's sob stories.

If anything, Harley Quinn is an ode to a woman's sensitivity and how her caring nature can be abused. Joker warped Harley's mind so much that she thought Batman was being cruel for beating him up and returning him to Arkham. The story is all too common; a successful woman is roped in by a compulsive liar or otherwise bad catch by enticing her with a story of a tragic childhood. Harley wasn't an idiot for falling in love with the Joker, she was a human who thought she could help him.

If anything, Harley is a reminder to us all that anyone can fall in love with the wrong person and it can make us do stupid things. She's not a character to be laughed at and called useless; she's a warning for girls everywhere about what happens when the wrong man gets his claws into you. So no wonder Jon doesn't like her. Harley is a victim of the manipulating characteristics of a man.

Most of all, I think Harley's fun and she brings some innocence back to the underworld of Gotham. I don't think Harley would ever really try and kill anyone with her own hands. She's more of a 'do the cutesy work' or be the entertainment kind of person. Though she is known to be violent at moments. Her wacky personality can slide between being un-realistically happy and then back into what we'd call a 'normal' attitude. In my own analysis, Harley is the everyday person. She is everything we can and could be. All of us have moments were we act stupid or 'blonde'. We all have moments where we laugh at something morbid or inappropriate and then we all have childish moments. Harley is all those things. She is unapologetically happy and won't let anyone spoil it for her, which is rare for women

She grows more confident when she becomes friends with Ivy and it's a short while before she finally learns to break away from the Joker. It's her and Red against the world, a female duo to show the sisterhood in being evil. There's no competition or bickering over men; it's a solid friendship built on the acknowledgement that they understand what it's like to be in an underworld dominated by men, for men. Most of all, their friendship shows Ivy overcoming her hatred of humans to care enough about Harley's abusive relationship. Ivy is the one person Joker can't touch and she's taking Harley with her.

So, if you don't appreciate her perkiness and the general humanity she brings to Gotham's dark side, then go soak your head.